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An Egg or a Mussel

Shells. Some require breaking out to grow. Others require growing with and adding to. How to know if breaking through or fortifying is necessary?

I really miss being able to watch TV

I mean like just turn on the TV, flip to a channel and watch. Now it's like, hey, let's watch the hockey game... what app is it? TSN? SportsNet? ESPN? Maybe it's CBC, no wait... then you find the app and it's not logged in... wtf is my password, wait which e-mail address... ok got it, WRONG PASSWORD, FUCK.... wait, I have a account with TELUS, log in with that... ok, what's the code, ok "CJ4PF5" -- type it in! I'm trying, it's not working, it's just spinning... wait, the Wifi is disconnected, is your Wifi ok? Should be, it's working for me, I don't know... ok turn off the Wifi and just use cell data... I can't, I have data turned off -- well, fuckin turn it on for 10 seconds, ok wait the Wifi is back... ok are we logged in? YES, there it is!! with 10 seconds left in the fucking period... great. Now what, should we order pizza? Sure, order something. Where? DoorDash? Skip the Dishes? Uber Eats? Why don't you just use the PizzaHut app directly... ok... fuck, I forgot my password

On losing

I’ve lost a lot of things in my long life. People, homes, pets, a few of my organs, a couple of careers, and most of my money (losing the organs helped with that part). I’ve had people ask me how I’m still going, and why I don’t linger in memories or would’ve could’ve should’ve thinking. The answer is simple: it doesn’t help. Moving on is the only choice unless you want to remain in misery indefinitely. It’s brutal at times, and it’s important to allow yourself time to recover and grieve the loss, but then you just put one foot in front of the other and you carry on. Eventually you get to a point where remembering isn’t as painful, but it takes time so be patient with yourself. Life is a journey and there might be something wonderful just up ahead.

Regret

Sometimes life choices are simply wrong. There's no bad guy, there's no redemption. There's no silver lining that the tough times mattered for some greater good. That hindsight will set one free towards enlightenment. Sometimes people f*ck up. Plain and simple. Jobs, relationships, parenting, facing the mirror. Can't win them all.

Horrid Painters

He's a beast of a man. He ravaged me, defiled me. I was left damaged and depraved. I'm certain I wasn't the only one who fell victim to his studio and his charms. Stay away from painters! They will ruin you forever.

The only people that think I'm introverted

Are the women whom I happen to be madly in love with. Except for one, who that I was extroverted. I only ever wanted to show them all I am just perverted, and then some.

Burned

I confess that I’m so afraid of being burned again that my fear has paralyzed me. Someone is letting me know that they want me, and I want them too, but the hurt is so deep that even thinking of speaking to them causes me intense anxiety. When trust is so badly broken, it takes a lot of work on the part of the person who broke it to earn it back again.

Well, at least I tried?

What is WRONG with single humans in this town? Dating is challenging and really disappointing. Lets' do the math: The last 8 weeks on FB dating: 25 matches - yay! 12 actually responding after we match 9 follow through with a conversation beyond a "hi" or "hey" 2 want me to migrate over to whats app and buy crypto (block/delete) 3 want me to send them nakkid pics (NOPE!) 1 sends me a nakkid pic of his privates unsolicited (block/delete) 2 move offline to old school phone calls.. several phone calls late into the evening - get along well - yay! 1 says he will make me the best food I will ever have - plans a date, does not pick a time/place/date..disappears day of date.... re-appears 3 days later but blames me for making him chose a place to meet and says he forgot... then maybe he should just come to my house and get naked for the first date? (block/delete) 1 sends a text after 10pm asking me to meet up for a drink at his house (we have NEVER met) NOPE - don't wanna get murdered. Back to zero again. Delete dating apps. resign myself to a solo life again.

How about

Next time your thinking of donating some food maybe some Sweet Italian Sausage. Some fresh vegetables, some potatoes. Not rice either. Some sweets maybe ! Fucken chicken parts is all that is donated apparently ? And not the good parts. And it's usually outdated . You know outdated means for everyone ! Food safety tip you never run hot water over unwrapped frozen pork to defrost it in a dirty sink. That could make you ill and it has.

I SAW YOU

Girl in the green jacket at Indigo Robson

I instantly saw you when I walked into the Indigo on Robson Street. Your green jacket and...

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