Parallel 49's Fanny Pack mixer the next best thing to a French banana bag

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      In Britain they’re known as a bum bag, with the French term being the positively filthy sounding banana bag.

      North Americans known them as a fanny pack—and let’s face it, they’re the most horrid fashion accessory this side of neon headbands, charm bracelets, and backward baseball caps.

      The invention defined by Merriam-Webster as a “small bag for carrying things that is worn with a strap which goes around a person’s waist” is so horrible that it was name-checked by “Weird Al” Yankovic in his admittedly less-than-immortal Chamillionaire parody “White & Nerdy”.

      Sometimes, however, a fanny pack is mildly excusable, providing you stay away from basic black or tan and go for the pink-ruffles look or one with a tropical-looking pineapple print.

      All of this brings us to the latest offering from the folks at Parallel 49. The East Van brewery has become as known for its endlessly innovative packaging as it is for its superior beer. This past spring Parallel 49 rolled out its Brew Brothers Volume 3 mixed pack, the box designed to look like an old-school ghetto blaster that Grandmaster Flash would have traded his corn-rows for.

      That’s been followed up by its just-released Fanny Pack mixer. The box-art features a suitably unsightly banana-yellow fanny pack containing three rendered-in-cartoon cans: Wobbly Pop, Craft Lager, and Jerkface 9000.

      Inside you get four of each, all deservedly loved by local beer enthusiasts, with the Jerkface 9000 earning best-in-show honours in our books, the wheat ale bursting with gorgeous grapefruit notes.

      The only disappointing thing is there’s no actual fanny pack inside the box. Or, if you happen to be French, banana bag.