From what exactly is mincemeat, to who asked Mariah Carey to ruin the holidays, there are things that enquiring minds want to know. We ask important questions so you don’t have to.

This Weeks’ Burning Question: “Christmas in November. Too soon, or not soon enough?”

“In those halcyon, pre-pandemic days before the advent of the prevailing dumpster fire we often find ourselves trying to climb out of, Billy Bob Thornton’s Willie ‘Tugboat’ Soak from Bad Santa was my seasonal lodestar. I grimaced when Andy Williams and Burl Ives assaulted my senses from the car radio upon a midnight clear. I sat at the proverbial bar sipping my Old Grand-Dad and glowered at glad tidings being exchanged. But the last two and a half years of isolation, on-again, off-again mandates, and rolling convoys of caricatures have made me ache for a little happiness, hail-fellow-well-met warm and fuzzies, and good tidings of great joy. So down here on Main Street, we’re getting spry, glamming up the joint with tinsel and ribbon for our annual charity toy drive, and I’m pushing all my holiday chips in and betting on red. Distract me. Delight my senses with gingerbread lattes and talking snowmen and ridiculous sweaters and shifty mall Santas skulking around the women’s big and tall section. When it comes to getting the festive feels nowadays, I say ’Tis the Saison. Bottoms up.”
- Main St. Brewing crisis management director Jan-Christian Sorensen

“My stocking’s been hanging on the fireplace for nearly two years. First time I heard I Against I it reminded me of The Royal Guardsman’s “Snoopy Vs. The Red Baron”. Whatever distracts old people from mortality’s crushing doom.”
- Stephen McBean, singer for Black Mountain and Pink Mountaintops

“Wayyy tooo sooon. December is already 1/12th of the year, lol. I still get to play Santa so there is magic in bringing my kiddo joy… but I am not an overtly Xmassy person. I worked in retail and bakeries in my early 20s so I know the pain of listening to Christmas music for two months, all day everyday. I am all for seeing fam and friends and eating sugar cookies, but it’s just not my personal bag, errr sack. It’s more something to get through, than relish in. So, yah, I don’t want more of it. But maybe I’m just a Grinch because when I was a kid our dog Raphael—named after a TMNT—got hit by a car and died right around Christmas. In fact we were watching Scrooged when it happened, so there you go.”
- Cate Horsley of Chalcedony

"I’m a fan of decorations December 1st onwards. It’s nice to have sparkly lights to cheer dark days up but if we have it all the time it just gets boring and almost invisible which seems to defeat the purpose.”
- Isabelle Dunlop of Combine the Victorious

“Bah humbug. You won’t ever see me putting up a Christmas tree or hanging icicle lights on my house ’til the month starts with the letter ‘D’. This coming from someone who has a birthday in December (19th—Zeppelin hoodie please). Christmas in November? No, thanks though. Despite Costco’s attempt to brainwash us into thinking that seeing Christmas decorations in stores in September is normal, it’s not. It’s like, dude, it’s not even Hallowe’en yet. Chill. Bottom line, if you’re putting up your Christmas tree and holiday decorations in November, at least wait until after Remembrance Day. After all, it’s Canada’s past generation’s bravery that allows you to start celebrating the festive season too early. Let’s honour our fallen heroes before we celebrate Santa’s birthday.”
- TodCast PodCast host Todd Hancock