It's official: Kid Rock is not running for the U.S. Senate

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      When Michigan musician Robert Ritchie, a.k.a. Kid Rock, suggested he might take a run for the U.S. Senate, the Straight's John Lucas expressed more than a bit of skepticism.

      "He does have an official 'Kid Rock for U.S. Senate' website, of course, but there has been much media speculation that this was a publicity stunt, and a rather effective one at that," Lucas wrote in July. "It was probably so effective because it smacked of reality. Terrifying, apocalyptic reality."

      Rock sold a bunch of T-shirts and managed to insert himself back into the public conversation. But as for that Senate run, that's simply not in the cards.

      "Fuck no, I'm not running for Senate," Ritchie told Sirius XM radio shock jock Howard Stern. "Are you kidding me? Who couldn't figure that out?"

      Lucas still managed to have fun with the idea while it lasted. In one of his columns, he showcased Ritchie's most politically incorrect lyrics, which included this gem from "Black Chick, White Guy: "Pretty girl in the ghetto, go figure/Yeah, she got macked by some dope dealin' nigger"

      Then there was this one from "Fuck Off": "Kid Rock, I couldn't be no Bozo/And I get too much P to ever be no homo... I'm not Peter Pan, I don't fuck with fairies/But I bust more rhymes than virgin cherries".

      Then again, if Donald Trump was able to survive the Access Hollwood tape...