We have some questions after Super Bowl LII

On Justin, Donald, Brady and the Hooded One

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      The Philadelphia Eagles won the first Super Bowl in the franchise’s history last night, besting the Powers of Evil (which coalesce into the form of the New England Patriots for football purposes) in an exciting 41-33 win.

      However, while the big question of which old, white owner was going to be given the trophy by commissioner Roger Goodell (maybe the worst tradition in all of sports) was sufficiently resolved, Super Bowl LII left us with many more questions than answers. Here are a few.

      What’s a catch?

      Of course the NFL wasn’t going to get through the Super Bowl without another controversy over what constitutes a catch. That happened again twice last night, as two crucial catches by Philadelphia players were questioned. Both were “catches” to any reasonable observer, but considering the archaic example the league has set throughout the last few years, both were considered controversial.

      The NFL is going to have to take a hard look at their rules in the offseason and what they actually mean.

      Where were the cameos in the halftime show?

      Fans of Justin Timberlake (and those that just kind of appreciate what he brings without being dedicated listeners of his music) spent much of the weekend speculating what guests JT would roll out for the big show.

      Would TI show up? How about Janet? Maybe N’SYNC?

      In the end, no one did, save for a giant projection of Prince to go along with a cover of “I Would Die 4 U” (the game took place in Minnesota, after all), and an introduction by his hokey pal Jimmy Fallon.

      Will Tom Brady keep chucking?

      Some, including sports radio host extraordinaire Dan Patrick, suggested that if Tom Brady won the Super Bowl this year, it would be his last. It’s hard to image Brady going out now, after winning the regular season MVP award and we can all be pretty certain that the robot will be back again next year.

      Who is Nick Foles?

      Seriously. Is he the borderline backup that he’s looked like for much of his career? Or is he the superstar we saw yesterday, who seemingly couldn’t miss a throw? Foles stood toe-to-toe with Brady for the entire game and that was a tall order considering the latter threw for over 500 yards.

      Did Bill Belichick get out-coached?

      In a word, yes, he did. Doug Pederson called the game of his life during the game of his life, and the Patriots had no answer for his gutsy play calling. It’s weird seeing the Hooded One be so obviously out manipulated, but here were are. Also, what the fuck was he wearing? 

      Will the NFL change the way it handles obvious concussions?

      Headshots are still met with a slap on the wrist, but after seeing star receiver Brandin Cooks leave its biggest stage after taking a massive head hit, will the NFL attempt to punish headhunters more severely in the offseason?

      How many Eagles won't go to visit Trump at the White House?

      At least three.

      It's tradition for the winning team to visit the White House and celebrate with the president. However, given how poorly Trump has treated NFLers this season (like second-class citizens), we wouldn't be surprised to see a healthy majority of the team refuse to go. Chris Long and Malcolm Jenkins, two of the Eagles' more outspoken players have already indicated they won't go, and LeGarette Blount didn't go last season when he was a member of the Patriots. 

      Who’s favoured to win next year’s Super Bowl?

      The Patriots, duh.

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