Respecting biodiversity, inclusive Port Moody police assist bear in exiting vehicle

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      In an ongoing effort to uphold equal treatment for all citizens and respect diversity and biodiversity regardless of gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender identity, ability, age, species, fashion sense, or bodily odour, inclusive Port Moody police have assisted a local bear after he was barely able to get out of his vehicle.

      Port Moody Police Department (PMPD) stated in a news release today (September 13) that early this morning, police were called to a residence on Ioco Road due to what was initially perceived to be an auto crime underway.

      However, when officers arrived, they discover that it was simply a bear struggling to exit a car.

      “As members arrived on scene to assist with containment it was apparent the suspect had gained entry with his bear hands,” Port Moody Sgt. Rob Degoey somehow stated in a PMPD news release.

      As B.C. Conservation officers assisted his egress, the bear was released from the unbearable situation “without charges”.

      According to unsubstantiated rumours, the bear was returning from a night out with other bears at a nightclub in the Davie Village.

      It remains unknown if he is single but it remains a possibility that he is on the Grouse Grindr.

      Observers have hypothesized that this bear felt welcome, included, and overly at home in Port Moody after the city launched a rainbow crosswalk on April 30. 

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