Homeless in Vancouver: Shroud of Astley

For many people around the world, the fact that U.K. singer Rick Astley once achieved mind-boggling international popularity has always been shrouded—we thought—in mystery.

We were wrong. Apparently it was shrouded in a brown bed sheet.

Just last week an artifact dubbed the “Shroud of Astley’s Career” was found in a Fairview back alley.

By all accounts it was a plain, slightly grubby, bed sheet painted with a likeness that immediately brought to mind a certain coiffed crooner.

There is no explanation why this would come to light now, some 27 years since the singer had his monster number one hit “Never Gonna Give You Up“.

Unfortunately, radio-carbon dating couldn’t even help us determine the age of the sheet—these days the radio part of the process won’t touch Rick with a 10-foot pole.

And, wouldn’t you know it, the bed sheet disappeared before it could be examined any further. Meaning now we may never be able to put the mystery of Rick Astley’s popularity to rest. 

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