Dear friend

posted April 7th, 2024 at 9:53 PM

We used to be friends. I remember the good old days when you were happier and kinder, now you’ve changed clearly. But not for the better. You’ve become a completely different person. You seem spiteful, cynical, and just downright mean. What happened? Where did we lose connection? We were friends. You never used to be like this. Where did we lose each other. Did it just slip away? Did something happen in your life that caused you to behave the way you do? Is there something about you that maybe I should know about? How can I help you? I wish you would just tell me what’s bothering you so that we could put an end to all this. I’m tired of fighting and I don’t want to fight anymore. There’s no need. Just tell me what’s wrong and maybe I can try to help you, even if it’s slightest bit.

6 Comments

Qtip

Apr 8, 2024 at 6:38pm

I wonder if this will be like the Banshees of Inisherin.

Possibilities

Apr 8, 2024 at 11:57pm

There are many reasons for why two people might grow apart. We each have separate lives and even friends can’t know everything. You don’t like some of your friend’s behaviour, and it’s equally possible that they might have a similar feeling about yours at times. I recently heard someone talking about a fallout with a friend, and when they were talking about all of their reasons for why they didn’t want to be around that person anymore, I was privately thinking that they may have judged too harshly. Sometimes people might need a gentle hint about something they do that doesn’t sit well with you. Sometimes instead of just cutting them off you need to try to understand what’s happened in their life that might have influenced their behaviour. Or not. It’s also a choice to simply cut off contact completely, but I also think it’s fair to allow that person a chance to offer their own opinion if you’re saying something that will hurt their feelings. The person I’m referring to has a relatively easy life. Very few health problems, no family or partner he’s responsible for or has to worry about, a comfortable lifestyle, etc. So I’ve noticed that he often seems a little clueless about how complicated and stressful other people’s lives are in comparison to his. If you still care about this friend at all, maybe it would be a good idea to reach out to them directly to say that you’d like to talk. If they agree, be prepared to hear some things about yourself that might be hard to hear too, since relationships really do take two. Good luck.

There there

Apr 9, 2024 at 12:39am

People change. It’s hard to explain why but sadly that’s just how it is. You cannot change the other person‘s thoughts, however they’re certainly not going to change your thoughts.

Cry cry crocodile

Apr 9, 2024 at 1:23am

Truth?
She didn't taste so good

Idea

Apr 10, 2024 at 3:08am

Cut them loose.

bowser

Apr 18, 2024 at 7:06pm

Anger is pain turned outwards!!!
Maybe your friend is in a lot of pain. I lived with chronic pain most of my life. But I couldn't articulate what was going on because I didn't realize what the cause of all my anger was. And since I had been hurting since childhood, it was "normal" to me. If you really want to find out what is going on and help your friend ASK THEM, not a bunch of strangers. You might find that you break through a wall they are not aware of. And then you will gain a real FRIEND!!!