Clueless but honest
“Sometimes I’ve done interviews where someone will ask me a question assuming I have some sort of master plan, and, honestly—I’m not being disingenuous—I have no idea what I’m doing.”
—Moby, on his not-so-master plan

Pelvis power
“I’m a big believer in fuck-you showmanship. You don’t want to watch someone just stand there. Every great live musician has always given you that extra little bit. Jimi Hendrix burned his guitar. Elvis did a weird dance that he stole from some black people.”—Thunderheist’s Isis Salam

Sorry, too cocky
“I heard that I was a cheater. It almost sounds like I was a bad husband. Not to say I was the greatest-I’m not perfect in anything I do-but I think I deserve a fucking trophy. If I do say so myself, without sounding too cocky, I gotta say I was a hell of a husband and a hell of a dad.”—Nas, discussing his split with singer Kelis

Smoke Break
“Drive safe, don’t smoke weed, and rock out with your cocks out! Peace motherfucker!”—Britney Spears at the end of her April concert at GM Place. Fans were left in the dark for 25 minutes after Spears abruptly left the stage halfway through her show. The crowd was later told that there was too much cigarette and marijuana smoke in the stadium and the air needed to clear

This is just imagination, girl
“The goal on this record was to create a second Thriller.”—Pop-punk musician (and 16-year-old) Shiloh on her (allegedly) soon-to-be-legendary second album, Picture Imperfect

Buffoon lampoon
“I’m not saying this is a plot by Hitler to steal Glenn Beck from all of us internal organ by internal organ by internal organ and then reprogram him to use as a weapon. But isn’t it fascinating that I’m the only one with the courage to ask these questions?”—Jon Stewart parodies Glenn Beck after the Fox News host is hospitalized for appendicitis

Ghost in the machine
“It’s hard to watch an image of Kurt pantomiming other artists’ music alongside cartoon characters.”
—A written statement by former Nirvana bandmates Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic on the inclusion of a Kurt Cobain avatar in the latest edition of Guitar Hero, which allows gamers to use the character to perform songs by artists such as Bon Jovi and Megadeth

Fight club
“I simply could not go on working with Liam a day longer.”—Oasis’s Noel Gallagher in a statement on the band’s MySpace page, referring to his brother in explaining why he is quitting the group after 18 years

Petty retort
“Would you say that to Tom Petty?”—Actor Billy Bob Thornton on CBC Radio, responding to a question about his passion for music. Thornton, apparently upset with host Jian Ghomeshi for mentioning Thornton’s acting career, remained passive-aggressive for the duration of the interview and at times refused to say anything

But he lives in a white house
“This president, I think, has exposed himself as a guy, over and over and over again, who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture.”—Fox host Glenn Beck on U.S. President Barack Obama

Thank you, your majesty
“I’ve had an hour’s sleep. I should be sleeping. And you know what? I was really tempted to go to bed and go, ”˜I can hear the phone ringing, but I’m going to lie here.’ But fuck it. I got to go somewhere after this anyway, so I might as well stay awake.”—Lady Sovereign, seconds after she decided to pick up the phone to talk to the Georgia Straight

New old songs
“I dunno what it’s like for kids who grew up on Limp Bizkit and that shit. What are they gonna come back to? And do I have to be around for it?”—CKY guitarist Chad I. Ginsberg on why going back to your roots isn’t always a good thing

Simple sister
“INXS has the same element of being stripped down and simple, but it doesn’t sound like you made it in your house on a four-track. I’m sure I’m gonna get shit for that.”—Lissy Trullie immediately regrets describing the sound she’s going for