I find that all this negative energy I've had is getting too much. It's alienated me from family members, coworkers and even a few friends. From here on out, I'm going to re-evaluate myself and step back, not make a huge mountain out of a mole. I think it's about time I start working towards a more positive mindset. I need to see the glass half full. Negative is not only mentally and emotionally exhausting, but physically. It's literally draining and can really suck the life out of you.

Full disclosure, I’ve been guilty of doing this myself before I saw the error of my ways. But when it happens now I see the motive behind it so clearly. When you don’t know all the circumstances of someone else’s life or especially, their medical situation, you’re not in any position to judge what they can or cannot do. Telling me about someone else that you think has the same medical condition as I do but is capable of doing “so much more” is just cruel. If you think it’s going to inspire the person you’re speaking to, think again. It’s not. It’s going to make them even more convinced that you have no idea of what they’re dealing with. No two people are alike. Especially when it comes to medical situations. Unless they have exactly the same physiological makeup and medical history, they are NOT the same. Even if they have the same diagnosis, they don’t share the same body! Please stop doing this to people, even if you think you’re being helpful or especially if you’re trying to do the “tough love” approach. What people who are trying to cope with difficult medical issues need the most is compassion and empathy, not judgment and condescension. Take your own ego out of the equation and stop assuming that you have all the answers.

Watching old reruns of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I couldn’t decide whether I liked the red ranger or the green ranger. They were both some of the coolest superheroes I grew up with. Zoran was this year big weird assed giant floating head. The series could be so hokey yet so funny I loved it.

I was recently blown away by a conversation with a good friend who went bankrupt last year. They were content winning arguments online with people than having their business continue. They had had a successful or moderately successful business. In doing so, somehow they got very invested in their online view of themselves and that became most important. I'm blown away because they had a choice. Log off and continue their business, go bankrupt and continue their online presence. They're still my friend, but man what a weird trip.

I confess that the biggest reason that I’ve lost respect for partners in my past is entirely due to courage. If they showed it, to be precise. So many of them believed that all they had to do was be physically strong or have money and that was enough to earn my respect. But all of them failed when it came to the courage it takes to be real. To be vulnerable and honest about your feelings and who you truly are. All the rest of it means nothing if you can’t do that. So I don’t care if you can lift the biggest log in the forest if you don’t have the courage to be real.

Y'all. I had to go to urgent care because I had a cyst pop unexpectedly and an obviously infected wound seeping pus everywhere, including soaking through my clothes as I waited to see doctor. This is why I opted for urgent care instead of an 8 hour emergency room wait. I waited two hours to get antibiotics. As I sat there and waited, people were turned away at the door because it was full for the day by 10 am. Meanwhile, some lady thinks needing to get a mole checked out is urgent. Some dude with eczema on his hand, that he could have had checked out by a pharmacist, thinks that's urgent. People are experiencing problems with their pregnancies and broken bones next to me, while half the people in there could have called 811 or done a simple google and seen what they have going on is not, in fact, urgent. Think about other people. Ask yourself what 'urgent' means, maybe? It's not rocket science.

A lot of these ageing rockers just don’t sound as good as they used to. A bunch of balding, out of tune, out of shape, overweight middle-aged men that sound either too drunk or stoned to sing, behaving like they’re in their early 20s all over again. And whenever they perform new material, most people sit down. People pay these guys to hear songs that they know, not the crap off some new album. Most ageing rock bands reunite after being split up for so long pretty much for the money. As a radio DJ in my generation once said, “I’d like to thank John, Paul, George and Ringo for not getting back together and spoiling a great thing.”

A recent confession made me think of the strange meandering that dating has taken over the last few years. I have been on lot's of dates in the last year and they are very much different than they were the year before. Hell, the most common thing I've dealt with lately is a complete wholesome innocence from most people. Almost like people have had a complete reset of their lives and are dating/hanging out for the first time. People with kids are completely different as well. They're not clingy to their kids or their parenting lives like I have ever seen it. Maybe being cooped up for so long dramatically changed them, but I've gone on enough dates lately with parents who haven't even mentioned their kids. It's almost felt like they're kids, or teenagers or something getting their independence for the first time as well. Many of my dates have ended in friend zones, but not forced, much more organic. like "I'm your age, we get along, maybe this isn't romantic, but this is something I want to continue." I've even been set up on dates from dates. It's all f*cking weird, but also kind of amazing. Toxicity will return I'm sure, but whatever... this spring is lovely.

It starts out very typically, but ends a bit oddly. Like many folks, I'll step out of the shower and towel myself dry, but before I start blow-drying my hair, I'll turn off the bathroom lights so that I can dry my hair in complete darkness. I think this started as a way to save on my hydro bill and turned into therapy of a sort. There's something about the combination of the white noise from the hair dryer, warm air on the skin and hair, and the darkness that is very soothing. You do need to have good spatial awareness and coordination, so I don't recommend to all. It's not entirely without risk of injury. You can't see what you're doing in the dark and could potentially wack yourself in the head with the hairdryer.

But no worries. Although the inner-life pains and struggles we all are challenged with, there is a way to let go of the negativity and find the comfort of Universal love ascension. Don't worry, be happy.