I dreamt of an elevator on fire with doors closed and smoke billowing out on the top floor. I get the impression this is the only way down to find out what my subconscious knows and it’s fighting to keep me out. Is it so terrible to know? I try to imagine what the worst could be, perhaps something life, limb, or morally threatening. What happened?

If we got rid of all law enforcement and every adult over 19 were issued a sidearm, a rifle and a thousand rounds of ammunition there would be a few weeks of absolute chaos followed by a thousand years of peace.

I just heard that some Karen complained about the resident cat in a grocery store in point grey, and the cat had to be removed. Why is Canada so broken? Why does the vocal minority outweigh everyone else's opinion? I'm on holiday in a country where every store has resident cats. Guess what? Everyone is happier (except maybe the mice...)

It’s in the little things where joy exists. Like waking up at 5 am and then realizing it’s a holiday and I can go back to sleep for as long as I want. Or hearing the happiness in my child’s voice when they tell me they’re in love. Or looking outside and seeing the rain and knowing that I can just enjoy a relaxing day curled up with a book and some tea. I’m feeling so grateful for a warm bed and a roof over my head, that my children are all safe, and for right now, the worries I carry can be laid down for a while. : )

I see attractive people on TikTok and YouTube who do not have to do anything amazing at all. They can be tying their shoe, and they will still get 10,000,000 likes. They are like 99% guaranteed to have the easiest life ever.

I took some Communication Studies classes in Uni; the medium is the message... So, what is a confession? It's always felt right to me anyway.

- I’ve imposed a 100% consumption tax on myself. When I buy something useless that I don’t need (I.e. a $40 eyeshadow palette) I now move the same amount to a Savings account. So that eyeshadow palette now costs me $80. And this effectively kills my desire to spend. -Replaced rice/bread/pasta/cereal products with protein and complex carbohydrates. I love said rice/bread/pasta/cereal. But I love being less puffy more. -I cold turkey stopped accommodating my family members. Boundaries. They can’t force, pressure, guilt, yell at me to do anything now. 2023 shaping up to be a year with more intentional structure.

My jaw hurts from eating so much so I can gain weight so I can't be seen as a sexual being because women being sexual beings is bad, people! You'll go straight to hell. Men being sexual beings? Sure meh whatevs God forgives. Drilled into me, Catholic upbringing. So just undo the damage, says you! You have no idea what you're talking about. So no sex, and disguise your body. Currently many pounds overweight. Lonely, isolated, virginal, zero experience with life or human beings, terrified. Forever. Good job me.

I remember all of the weekend mornings and early afternoons that protestors spent outside of the chicken factory protesting humans eating meat in a free and democratic society. Good for them. That's a bit strange, but good on them. Weirdos. But then I started protesting back on the GS. I must say, I think I won. I don't know if it was the fact that I fought back in the arena of public opinion or that they spent precious time protesting endlessly in a city where one must work tirelessly to survive and get by. Part of me suspects that they might have gone broke and had to move to Calgary or something-- the land of the chicken breast.

Years ago, I kept two small stuffed bears on a bookcase, near my bed. A panda bear and a brown bear. I used the bears to demonstrate different sexual positions to a lover.