Epiphanies can come in strange guises.

Two very young missionaries (from China and Australia) hailed me on Marine Drive the other day. The conversation that followed was quite unexpected. They were surprised because I don't look anything like a geek these days. I was surprised because, when they asked me what was most important in life, I answered: "Company."

Coming from an introvert expressed to the point of caricature, that is some JARRING cognitive dissonance. Still, it's true - among all my memories, the ones that glow brightly are usually related to the humans important to me.

I speak workaholic. At one point I went two years without weekends. For a very long time now, I've been working with and/or in startups. Doing that is like pushing a slippery rock up a burning slope while trying to put out the fires - 80-hour work weeks, lack of resources, other people's mistakes, one's own mistakes, changing conditions, competitor reactions...It's a hamster wheel, and there is no closure to this mindset.

It's easy to accept that pattern here, in one of the most expensive places on the planet. Material success is the only (almost) universal socially accepted metric.

The things everybody believes to be true are often bullshit. Perhaps time for a rethink.

What everybody knows is that Companionship is the most important thing. Some call it love or connection or relationship with another. Hello? We all know work doesn't buy that kind of happiness. Your rethink is long overdue.
To the OP - if you suspect he won't be really there for you, move on to someone who will.

@@gn

Perhaps this wasn't obvious enough, but I already had the rethink, a longish time ago. Was recommending same for OP.