Various Artists
Santa’s Got Mojo 2

If you’re sane, nothing will give you the blues faster than the thought of spending Christmas in the icy hell that is Ontario in the winter. Musically speaking, people from Toronto have as much right to play electric blues as a bunch of pasty English blokes did back in the ’60s. Hell, jolly ol’ Saint Nick himself could belt out a verse or two of “The North Pole Blues” (“When I woke up this mornin’/Reindeer shit was on my lawn”) then take an extended solo on his Fender Santacaster, using a King Leo Jumbo Peppermint Candy Stick as a slide, and we’d be cool with that. That doesn’t make this compilation of 12-bar atrocities any less cringe-inducing. The upside is that it might make you thankful you live here and not in the city overseen by that rosy-cheeked fat man. (Rob Ford, I mean, not Kris Kringle.)