California authorities find alligator guarding 34 pounds of marijuana

What do you do when you're growing over $100,000 of weed and you need a little home security? You hire an alligator, obviously.

On January 9, Alameda County sheriff's deputies were conducting a probation check on 34-year-old California resident Assif Mayr when they found a five-foot alligator guarding 34 pounds of marijuana in the man's bedroom.

Mayr was taken into custody under suspicion of possessing marijuana for sale. (You think?)

Dr. Teeth, as the gator is known as, was quite sick when authorities found him. He is currently recuperating at the Oakland Zoo.

Man, in B.C., we 're stuck with lousy old bears to protect our grow-ops. BORING!