’Tis We (Independent)

As anyone who’s ever seen the drunk-hobo shitshow that is Victoria Park will confirm, East Van is a scary place, populated by flag-waving radicals, militant vegans, and the folks who gave birth to the monster known as Milan Lucic. It makes perfect sense, then, that Doomeastvan plays metal at its most terrifying.

Forget nuts-in-a-fruit-press shrieking or stadium-ready riffing, this is heavier-than-Hades music straight from the darkest of sewers. The song titles read like something that Ed Gein might put on a mix tape between grave-robbing trips, with highlights including “Sketches of Pain”, “Assisted Suicide”, and “Please Don’t Hurt Me”.

The band files itself under “doom metal”, so it’s no surprise the guitars shred with impressive precision, while the drummer appears to have an arrangement where he’s paid by the beat. As for the vocals, think congested Orc with a three-bottle-a-day Drano habit.

That said, one needn’t be completely committed to the headbanging cause to embrace Doomeastvan. “Control or Destroy” works a far-beyond-driven groove made for piloting a Hearse through Death Valley, while the grinding “Daughter of Doom” ditches the blown-larynx vocals for a delivery that, while toned down, is still as sinister as Grimms’ Fairy Tales.

It’s all scary stuff. Kind of like, you know, East Van.