Starring Peter Dinklage, James Belushi, and Patrick Warburton, and featuring the voice of Jason Lee. Rated G.

When a nameless beagle showered in "serum" undergoes cellular something or other to be transformed into the crime-fightin' Underdog, many powers become his. Sadly, narrative coherence is not one of them. Yes, he can save the day, fly, and chew butt–and even, as fans of the '60s Saturday-morning cartoon will recall, rhyme at the same time–but he can't save this live-action update from Disney.

It's a pity. I knew the cartoon's vermouth-dry wit wouldn't survive the leap to the big screen, but I was hoping for some of the classic vibe of family films from the period, magic-made-real features like Blackbeard's Ghost and The Love Bug. Nope. That would have required director Frederik Du Chau ( Racing Stripes ) to let the movie just be a movie–and where would all the heavy-handed thematicizing fit in?

Underdog (or, rather, his secret identity, Shoeshine) just wants a home. Teen owner Jack (Alex Neuberger) just wants a family, and his dad (James Belushi) is just so scared about leaving Jack an orphan after his wife dies that he quits the force to become a security guard at the freaky animal-testing lab down the way. "Family is good" is a classic Disney cliché, but Underdog doesn't stop there. We get "Believe in yourself", "Love will conquer all", and (obligatory after 9/11) "Cops are heroes" too. There's barely room for plot, which is okay. That way, villainous Simon Barsinister (Peter Dinklage, with one of the great nogoodnik names) doesn't need to explain why he wants to sneak around the sewers, blow stuff up, or release toxins from the top of City Hall.

The best stuff is in the trailer, so if you want to see a beagle talk and fly, I highly recommend the Web site. From another point of view, my 11-year-old enjoyed the explosions and mayhem immensely.

What's more, to boot, beagles are really cute!