I just watched that viral video of would-be robbers being driven from an Ontario cannabis dispensary by a bong-wielding employee, and I'm not impressed at all by the actions of the store's supposed guard dog.
At the start of the clip you can see the mutt come bounding in behind the Bongmeister, jumping around like it owns the place, pausing on the ATM mat just long enough for a quick loin-lick before scampering out of sight to no doubt bury its face in a dish of Country Kibble.
But where's the pampered pooch when the bad guys storm in, shootin' bear spray and dancing around like knucklehead ninjas? Does it fearlessly launch itself off the counter, using its wee chompers to rip the skull-mask bandana off one guy so he can be easily ID'd? Does it come racing around the corner in a blur to incapacitate the one with a paralyzing fear of rats?
No, the little kibble freak makes itself scarce while its brave owner does battle alone, playing Babe Ruth with a glass bong to send the intruders packing.
Chihauhaus of the world, hang your heads.