It’s funny how times change. Judging by the old English Christmas carol “The 12 Days of Christmas”, people sure used to have a lot of disposable income. Ever priced a pear tree at David Hunter Garden Centers, and a partridge at PetSmart? You’re seriously looking at over a hundred bucks, which really starts to add up when you figure you’ll be forking out for 12 of them over the 12 days of Christmas. And let’s not even think about what kind of cheddar you have to have to afford 40 golden rings, 22 turtledoves, 40 maids a-milking, a supersized gaggle of French hens, and a mini-orchestra of pipers piping.

All of this raises the question, of course, of where in the hell people kept this nonstop cavalcade of gifts back in the old days. They sure as hell weren’t living in 350-square-foot Coal Harbour condos if they were having to make room for a bunch of leaping lords and piping pipers.

Yes, it’s a different world today. So instead of buying the loved ones in your life a bunch of crap that they are only going to have to sell on Craigslist in a desperate attempt to declutter, why not give them the gift of music?

Or, more specifically, live music. Below you’ll find 10 great pre-Christmas concert gift ideas for folks who wouldn’t have a clue how to care for a pear tree, let alone a partridge.

Moist (December 4 at the Hard Rock Casino, Coquitlam)
Hard as this might be to believe today, the glory days of ’90s alt rock didn’t start with Nirvana and end with Pearl Jam. Vancouver’s own Moist released a slew of great singles back when alternative was fresh and new, none of them finer than “Push”, the video for which is still as strangely mesmerizing today as when it first surfaced on MuchMusic. Not content to rehash old glories, Moist, which was MIA for basically all of last decade, returns to action with a new album, Glory Under Dangerous Skies.
Great gift for: Former ’90s cool kids who haven’t been out of the house since MuchMusic actually showed music videos.

John Reischman & the Jaybirds (December 5 at St. James Hall)
One of the most accomplished bluegrass units in the country (and, for that matter, on the planet), John Reischman & the Jaybirds help ring in the season with style and taste, highlighting songs from a new eight-song EP titled On a Winter’s Night. If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to spend December 25 in the Smoky Mountains, Reischman’s ace mandolin-playing will give you a great idea.
Great gift for: Traditionalists whose dream Christmas-dinner guests include Flatt and Scruggs, the Osborne Brothers, and Bill Monroe.

Prevail & Kyprios (December 6 at Fortune Sound Club)
What’s better than spending an evening with one of the true groundbreakers of Vancouver’s homegrown hip-hop scene? The answer to that would be a double shot of Van City royalty. Fortune Sound Club, which is famous for having one of the best sound systems in the city, hosts Swollen Members cofounder Prevail and solo artist Kyprios, currently working his critically lauded latest album, Midnight Sun.
Great gift for: Heads who remember seeing Sweatshop Union back when mix tapes were actually released on tape.

My Brightest Diamond (December 7 at Electric Owl)
There’s an old saying that goes something along the lines of “You can tell a lot about a person by the company that they keep.” On that note, consider the talent that Shara Worden has been associated with over the course of her career, the shortlist including Fatboy Slim, David Byrne, the Decemberists, and Sufjan Stevens. Discerning indie-rock aficionados, however, know Worden best for her own records under the name My Brightest Diamond, her latest, This Is My Hand, having earned such descriptions as “haunting” and “tribal” (Magnet), “implosive” (AllMusic), and pretty much the best thing this side of St. Vincent (NME). You’ll get no argument here.
Great gift for: Anyone who’s ever dreamed of scoring a six-album deal with Asthmatic Kitty.

Rufus Wainwright (December 7 at the Vogue Theatre)
The term Renaissance man gets tossed around a fair bit in the world of pop music, with artists from Jack White to Sting to Nick Cave among those who have been thus designated. Few, however, have truly deserved the title as much as Rufus Wainwright, who, as he hits the road on a greatest-hits tour, has already had the kind of career someone really needs to make a movie about. Since first knocking critics out with his eponymous 1998 debut, the 41-year-old has scored Shakespeare sonnets, toured America in drag while performing Judy Garland numbers, written for dance troupes, and generally done whatever the hell he wants. Most Renaissance men should be so bold.
Great gift for: Freethinkers who understand there’s no point flying your freak flag unless you’re going to fly it sky-high.

Down (December 11 at the Commodore)
To casual fans who only know him for his untouchable work with Pantera, the fact that Phil Anselmo is not only alive but still making music is probably a shocker. Hard-core devotees, however, know full well there is far more to the hard-living 46-year-old than the band that made him famous. Anselmo has been in more groups than Mark Lanegan and Mike Patton combined, with the New Orleans–based Down receiving most of his attention over the past decade. Who can blame him for being excited about the project, considering his brothers in arms include members of Corrosion of Conformity and Crowbar? Clearly, you can’t keep a good man down, especially when he’s given every indication that the only rules he follows are his own.
Great gift for: American-steel die-hards who love their metal 100 percent pure.

Mother Mother (December 13 at the Orpheum)
If you’ve been paying even the slightest bit of attention to our booming local music scene over the past few years, you might have noticed something wonderful happening. It used to be that local acts would spend their entire careers getting to the point where they could fill the Commodore, and then slowly slide backwards into irrelevance. These days, our homegrown heroes send a message that they’ve officially arrived by playing the Queen E. or the Orpheum. Take a deep bow, Mother Mother. The former Straight cover stars continue to build momentum with their excellent and ambitious fifth full-length, Very Good Bad Thing, released early last month.
Great gift for: Indie rockers who will argue there’s no such thing as too crazy, quirky, or just plain inspiringly great.

Skinny Puppy (December 16 at the Commodore)
There’s no denying that the idea of Skinny Puppy right before Christmas in some ways makes about as much sense as watching Rankin-Bass’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer at Halloween. But think about the bigger picture and, really, what could be a more fitting way to prepare for the hell that is the Xmas season than listening to the trailblazing industrial icons? Skinny Puppy’s latest is titled Weapon, and, like pretty much everything the band has done over the course of its long and legendary career, it sounds like an apocalyptic, digitally generated nightmare. Happy holidays!
Great gift for: Misanthropes who still can’t understand why Santa doesn’t hit the skies in a suit that’s blacker than a Death Valley coal mine.

Keithmas V (December 19 at Electric Owl)
Think what a wonderful gift immortality would be—you could not only drink every distillery in Tennessee dry on a daily basis, but do enough drugs to impress the ghosts of Sid Vicious, Johnny Thunders, and Amy Winehouse. No one has come closer to making it clear that civilization is going to die before he does than Rolling Stones legend Keith Richards. Keithmas V is, as the name suggests, a dual celebration of Christmas and, more importantly, Richards’s birthday. Who cares that it takes place this year a day after the legitimate rock god turns 70? It’s the thought—nine as-yet-unannounced local bands raising money for the Greater Vancouver Food Bank—that counts. And if you miss this one, no worries, as there will be an infinite number of birthdays to celebrate from now until eternity.
Great gift for: Stones fanatics who have never quite got over missing the band’s official farewell tour in 1982.

Yung Lean & Sad Boys (December 19 at the Vogue Theatre)
Sweden has given us countless wonderful things over the years: Daniel and Henrik Sedin, meatballs, ABBA, IKEA, the chef from The Muppet Show, and top-drawer ’70s porn. What it’s never produced is a great rapper. Until now, that is. Get ready to meet Yung Lean, the MC whose name sounds like something you might see on a Chinese restaurant menu, but whose album Unknown Memory has been embraced as the most important international rap import since Die Antwoord’s $O$.
Great gift for: Wannabe Swedes obsessed with Daniel and Henrik Sedin, meatballs, ABBA, IKEA, The Muppet Show, and top-drawer ’70s porn.