Why?

Why do I always attract the boken ones?

11 Comments

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Law of Attraction

Jan 2, 2018 at 4:19pm

The law of attraction states that “like attracts like.” This means that people with a low frequency — people who are insecure and self-abandoning — attract each other, while people with a high frequency — people who love and value themselves — also attract each other.

Hrmm...

Jan 2, 2018 at 5:49pm

John Cleese and some psychiatrist wrote a book in, gosh, I guess the 70s or 80s about pop psychiatry and family life. In one of the chapters, he talks about how people with psychiatric issues often attract partners who have psychiatric issues because this is actually learned behavior from the parents. Obviously this isn't in fashion now with the "chemical imbalance" theory, although obviously being exposed to neurotic/crazy parents could create a "chemical imbalance," so they the psychoanalytic and biopsychiatric approaches are not necessarily 100% contradictory---but pills are cheaper than analysis, and, if the ultimate realization of the problem is in the neurochemistry, then drugs might help as much or more than talking about mother and how she screamed at father and how it's _really funny_ that my wife is doing the _same things I saw Mom do_...

I mean, this is why there's that whole Freudian cliche of "Tell me about your mother..." Mothers and fathers (tho especially mothers, because, as the feminists are fond of telling us, they do all of this awful unpaid early childhood education) are quite responsible for the future attitudes of their children, toward love, marriage, dating, etc.

So, this book, and who wouldn't trust John Cleese, would suggest that you attract broken ones because you are broken in a similar way, and you are attracting people with the same flaws, because you both had similar upbringings and therefore can relate to one another. The people who didn't have such broken upbringings aren't attracted to you because you can't relate to them.

IMO "broken upbringing" is far more reasonable than "broken brain chemistry"---"brain chemistry" is a symptom, what is the cause?

12 5Rating: +7

rb

Jan 2, 2018 at 6:15pm

because you're spelling is atrocious

@Law of Attraction

Jan 2, 2018 at 6:30pm

Oh, please. There are a *lot* of people with issues out there and that's basically blaming a person for someone treating them poorly. That's spiritual bullying and it's B.S. It takes a long time to really get to know people and you can't always tell right away what someone's intentions are. Sometimes their intentions are not so good and that's not your fault.

EVERYONE gets together with a jerk now and then. It doesn't mean that you have "low frequency" (whatever that means). You can love and value yourself and still get snowed by a jerk. It can happen to ANYONE. This Law of Attraction theory just makes people believe that they have control over all situations, which they don't.

Also, the Law of Attraction "documentary" was a bunch of privileged white dudes and a few men of color and a token women of color, no? So you're telling me that people born into extreme poverty attracted that to them? Please. I am so tired of hearing this crap - it breeds lack of empathy and a total twisting of true issues.

Dating is a numbers game. Eventually you will meet someone you're compatible with. Keep trying.

8 8Rating: 0

@rb

Jan 2, 2018 at 7:04pm

Hey, maybe their keyboard is boken.

10 4Rating: +6

@rb

Jan 2, 2018 at 8:20pm

you mean....because you're spelling atrociously, or, because your spelling is atrocious!

6 3Rating: +3

Broken?

Jan 2, 2018 at 10:04pm

The real question is, why aren't you broken too?

4 4Rating: 0

@rb

Jan 2, 2018 at 10:05pm

lol
It's "your" not "you're".

7 5Rating: +2

@Law of Attraction

Jan 2, 2018 at 11:43pm

Like doesn't always attract like.
Sometimes the more trusting or vulnerable or hurt somebody is, the more likely they are to attract a predatory person. The lions are always out there looking for the zebra with a limp.
(Try not to be the zebra with a limp.)

14 3Rating: +11

Because

Jan 3, 2018 at 10:49am

You break the attractive ones.

5 5Rating: 0

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