I don’t know...
posted May 19th, 2020 at 3:59 PM
How to handle the constant interruptions from my partner while I am talking. I’ve tried telling them numerous time they need to let me finish. It’s so infuriating to be questioned about things halfway through about something you would have gotten to anyway. All the interruptions do is make me shut down because I don’t feel I’m being listened to. I’ve tried and tried to encourage my partner to stop but I’m starting to get snippy now because it never ends..,. What can I do?
26 Comments
Post a CommentUnless...
May 19, 2020 at 5:53pm
... you are going to go to some etiquette manual and have it lay down the law, your partner might feel stifled and not listened to by having to wait. I mean, feelings aren't rational, maybe if he doesn't interject he feels bad. Who knows.
This is why I favor prescriptive rules, rather than this bullying game of feelings. You're not being listened to, he is interjecting. Do you want an etiquette book? I don't mind if people interrupt me, so obviously this is not something everyone shares. Interrupting in conversation is one of the last areas where we still have a little give and take. I guess the sand on the beach feels that the sea is interrupting its repose.
What you need to do
May 19, 2020 at 6:51pm
Is start secretly recording your conversations.
Then when she starts talking, you interrupt. Keep doing it till she gets mad,and then will likely deny it. Then you play back your collection of interruptions
I think you know
May 19, 2020 at 6:57pm
what to do. Next time tell them like it is and just say “would you please shut the fuck up, when it’s your turn to talk I’ll let you know when I have my shoes on.” Now sit your ass down until I’m done. Won’t get it unless you say it
Forced Empathy
May 19, 2020 at 7:01pm
Yeah that's one of my pet peeves too. Some self important jackass thinks conversation etiquette applies to everyone else except them. Just interrupt them every time they wish to say something in the same manner they do to you. They'll feel your annoyance that they cause you every time you want say something pretty damned fast. Sometimes you just have to make them feel your pain before they can understand it.
My brestie does this
May 19, 2020 at 7:11pm
At first I would just shut up when he interrupted for like the 4th time. I'd tell him it's distracting and to please not do that. He would forget.
What's worked for us is that if it's something really important I want to tell him or talk about I start with; "there is something I want to tell you, and I know you like to ask questions. However, I'd really appreciate it if you could hold off until after I'm finished. I will keep it brief as possible, you can ask as many questions as you'd like." Sometimes I offer a pen and paper so he can write down the Q's that come to his head.
It really works actually for both of us. It's saved the best friendship either of us have ever had and it's over 10 years strong.
Obedience school ?
May 19, 2020 at 7:37pm
Rolled up magazine perhaps
Have you ever
May 19, 2020 at 7:54pm
tried to doing the same to them?
Or at least interrupt their interuption. ;)
('m guilty of doing that unintentionally)
Anonymous
May 19, 2020 at 8:04pm
I used to interrupt my partner all the time, not to question what they were saying, out of excitement, in agreement. It's the way of certain cultures, raucous conversations, all speaking over one another. Whenever they said "let me finish" it worked for me. The constant silencing wasn't for me in the long run...Maybe your partner is starting to feel resentment?
Opposite Problem
May 19, 2020 at 8:06pm
I have a partner who talks and talks without pause. If I don't interrupt, I never get a word in edgewise.
Sometimes
May 19, 2020 at 8:23pm
You just need to tell them to shut the hell up.
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