The only thing
posted March 18th, 2021 at 1:52 AM
I regret is not telling people off more often in life, when they deserved it. Avoiding conflict and just rolling over is not a solution to anything!!
posted March 18th, 2021 at 1:52 AM
Dan offers some advice on where she might find it.
We both abruptly stopped on the corner of W Hastings/Cambie near the park and seamlessly started...
16 Comments
Post a CommentAgreed
Mar 18, 2021 at 5:35am
I wholeheartedly concur. :)
Not being able to just firmly and definitely say "No", with finality, is a cause of so much suffering and inhibition of free choice, as well as of personal boundary violations.
Not being able to just say "no" at will, whenever there's a self-boundary we don't want crossed or transgressed, is a pretty terrible habit to have. A learned and ingrained behavior in a lot of us who have been broken by others or by unethical systems repeatedly throughout life to the point that self-determination has been thoroughly degraded, maybe, but still a habit that needs changing, in those cases.
And if Gabor Mate (and my own experience) is to be believed, it's also one of the major causes of certain expressions of bodily dis-ease, as well.
The...
Mar 18, 2021 at 7:55am
... ppl who say avoid conflict want easy marks.
You gotta fight
For your right
To party!
But who decides?
Mar 18, 2021 at 8:46am
When they deserve it? Judgy people enjoy telling other people off, like a pastime.
I stood up for myself recently
Mar 18, 2021 at 9:43am
And felt awful that I hurt others. Did they hurt me? Yes. Did making them feel how I felt help anyone, myself especially? No. Realize that many people's bark right now is all they have. Many people will blow over like dust in the wind if and when people push back on their shitty ways. I am not saying roll over, just saying that all actions have unintended outcomes.
Good
Mar 18, 2021 at 12:31pm
Too many bullies and jerks getting away with their shitty behavior because no one calls them out.
Yup
Mar 18, 2021 at 12:41pm
If someone starts on you you have get in thier face and tell them to fuck off. Unless their your mom, everybody else can suck it.
@I stood up for myself recently
Mar 18, 2021 at 2:35pm
These people who make it to adulthood in bubbles without any pushback are useless---they can't serve, they can't rule, they can't do anything but stare at their own reflections.
They need to be pushed over, that's life. They'll get back up again and be stronger for it.
Life goes on
Mar 18, 2021 at 3:01pm
I know how you feel since I've also been in these types of situations, but keep I mind that I cannot change the past. All I could ever do was learn from it, accept the situation as it is and move on. Just let it go. Take one day at a time. Out of sight, out of mind.
But where does it end
Mar 18, 2021 at 3:39pm
If someone is coming for you personally and is in a position to do you real harm then yes, defend yourself. All the way if you have to.
But if it makes no difference, it's just some idiot being an idiot, why bother? There are so many idiots, and we live in a city, hence a fairly dense concentration (no pun intended).
I find that getting angry doesn't do anything constructive for me, and raises my blood pressure, which is bad for me.
People might think I am too easy going and a pushover, but I don't give a fuck about that.
Yes
Mar 18, 2021 at 6:13pm
I'm putting my foot down.
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