When you've been at a job for as long as I have...4 weeks of vacation is not enough.

I was in a toxic work environment and felt hopeless. Being bullied to death and manipulated by ignoramuses nearly cost me a great deal of my mental health. The whole experience just sucked the life out of me. It seemed like there was no way out and I contemplated leaving months earlier, but held on because I tried to fight until the bitter end. It was a losing battle, definitely not a win win situation. So I did something that I never thought I would do. I straight up walked right out the door. Didn’t give any notice.

I hate birthdays. They remind me of the tangled weave of the family tree

I'm going to take real care to savor and appreciate Christmas with my family this year.

My bf is completely obsessed with his appearance. We’re both seniors, and this obsession of theirs is becoming more than tedious. I’ve known him for 20 years, and he’s always been very vain and self-absorbed, but even though I know that he’s actually very insecure and that’s why he’s so obsessed, it’s still driving me crazy. He’s always asking me to admire his body and tell him how good he looks. He almost never says a thing about my appearance, even though he knows that I’m feeling badly about it due to some serious health setbacks over the past few years, and just normal female aging issues. I’m just not sure how much more of this I can take. I want a guy who has enough depth of character to comprehend that what I’d be more impressed with at this stage of our lives is mental and spiritual growth, and not just how many f’ing push ups he can do.

I have a secret dirty old man crush on this black belt amazonian wonder woman that's old enough to be my daughter. If only I were me 20 years ago with all my hair and a lot less scars. Maybe my next purchase should be a motorbike. I want to feel alive and young again. I want to forget everything that I had lost. I wish I could go back and keep my hair and dodge all of my scars.

it gets dark so early that I find myself going to bed earlier and earlier as there's nothing to do. Yesterday it was 8 : 30 !

I think you know you're in love with someone when you start to really care about some random weird part of their body you never thought about before on anyone else. Like the shape of their nose. Or their ear lobes. Or their knees. In my case it was their fingers. Long light olive fingers. The kind of fingers that are meant for artistic pursuits. Piano, weaving, drawing. They had a nervous habit of picking at the skin around the nail. Somehow it was all really endearing to me.

I don’t know why but I always end up saying some stupid thing around people. I get so embarrassed after like I wanna hide away and pretend I don’t exist.

I will have saved like $1600 this year on the bus. WFH!!!!! Whoooo! Escaped the corporate assembly line machine!