Now that I am older I can see that in the past I made serious life choices based on family relationships such as career choices or job choices based on where family lived and how they felt about me. I also chose to live my life according to what was best for my husband for many years. As a result I never really pursued what was in my heart or my abilities and as a consequence of that my career has not been able to survive serious health issues plus some disadvantages that I already had, so now I have realized that I should have lived life as if they were not so important, but it is obviously too late. They are no longer in my life, some have died, some have just not stayed close, and it is me who has to live with my choices so from now on it has to be a choice that makes sense for me. There is still time to have some of those experiences that I once hoped for and never realized that will make the difference, when I look back at the end of my life.