I have social anxiety as well and I also have no friends so your not alone. There are a lot of people in your situation. We're in the shadows.

I'm in my early thirties and I, too, have no friends. I believe that social anxiety is part of the reason -- but for me, it's mostly rooted in distrust towards others, after a long, unhappy childhood of being bullied in school and living in a dysfunctional, unloving family. I believe that this is the cause of my continual struggles to relate to others, as well as letting others take advantage of me, foolishly led by false hopes that if I give myself to others, I will gain a new friend. That has never been the case, and I try to convince myself to learn from it -- but it results in me always questioning other people's motives whenever they try to get overly friendly with me. Just a simple smile or a "hi" from a stranger will instantly put me on guard, and immediately make me wonder how I'm going to get screwed over today.

My depression over having no friends is balanced with my intense dislike for people in general, developed after years of bad experiences in dealing with people. I have zero tolerance of BS from others, and I admit, I am judgemental. But it's not like others haven't been guilty of the latter, either. I've had my share of so-called "friends" who "forget" to invite me to parties, never answer my calls or texts, backstab me with rumours, lies and cruel jokes, take advantage of me for their own selfish gain, and are never around when I needed them the most. Once I realize how I've been royally screwed by these traitors, I've had no choice but to cut them out of my life. Of course, that leaves me as lonely as ever.

I've tried hard to put a positive spin in all of this, and appreciate the benefits of being alone. Like, not having to drag myself to social outings when I'm exhausted after a long day at work; money saved from not needing to buy birthday or Valentine's gifts for others (because living in Vancouver is expensive, so every dollar saved counts); pursuing my own interests that others are unable to appreciate or don't even care about; and having the freedom to do whatever the hell I want, at my own schedule.

Still, there are times when I long for friendship. It's very awkward to eat out on Friday night with nobody with me, for example. And Christmas and New Year's is not fun when there's nobody to celebrate it with. But I cannot bear to be screwed over by others again, so I am miserable either way.

I only have a few friends...but that is because I live life my way.

so considering that everyone here has this in common (and I'm sincerely sorry to read it), is anyone going to break the ice and suggest that you guys link? perhaps theres a friendship in waiting there?? (for what its worth) good luck

How much bullshit can u take? I'm sorry I'm just not gullible anymore. . Don't get me wrong, not everyone is a douche bag. But most often they are. I'm in my early thirtys and former "popular" girl. .Enjoy your life plan.. focus on yourself.

We could meet up. .but more than likely, u'll be a dick. Or maybe it's me.. ;-)