"It would be a comfortable life with a nice place and vacations every year."

Your first and really only love is the material. You may lust after people, but you certainly don't love anyone.

Like an idiot. I dont respect girls like you because I know the type of guy you are with.

Obviously neither

How about neither and look elsewhere? That said, I'd take boring sex and great everything else guy because if he really does care for you as you say, y'all can start working on the sex thing. Lots of courses and sex clubs and stuff to explore together until you find what flats your boat. If you take great sex shitty everything else guy I can guarantee that great sex won't last and you'll have nothing to build on.

like the perfect recipe for disaster. Run. Fast. Now. Find out what is making your sex life boring with respectful, nice, sweet guy and work on it. If the love really is as deep as you say, you need to work on the disconnect and try to conner again. Having sex with Mr.Disaster isn't going to solve anything, it will only complicate your emotional, physical and mental life more. You need to make a choice...and it seems rather obvious.

oooohhh huunnn , the heart wants what the heart wants, and sometimes a leap of faith is worth a thousand steps.... why play safe???

Boring and secure over fun with issues? Both sound like future heartaches to me. Do yourself a favour and find someone you truly mesh with.

Ive been in the same situation.

the answer is to be on your own now!

is get over yourself

Great sex is replaceable great deep connections are not. Sex can be worked on, you can communicate, compromise and figure out what works for each other and relight the flame in a whole new way. If you like heartache then maybe awesome sex guy is for you. If I were you I'd take sweet deep love guy and see if we can work it out. If/when you really love someone, you can and will. But this time you need to be open and honest about the things you want/need and so does he, so make sure that's a condition of getting back together if you do it. You have to talk about why things failed and what can be done to correct it this time. For instance you said you tried recently and it was awkward... why was it awkward? Figure that out and figure out what can be done about it. Awesome sex guy is only gonna hurt you in the end. Your ex is right not to respect him, he doesn't sound very respectable from your description.

Then again you considered the thought of having both and expressed disappointment in their unwillingness to share which tells me you're in it for one person only. If that's the case then how about leaving both guys, sticking to sex and don't get emotionally attached or consider exploring open relationships where sex and emotions can be freely shared with whomever.